Just CC Me

What if your mom pop or sis said this to you?

Years ago, one morning, I woke up to an email in which I was merely cc'ed. The email was a 'response' from one of the teachers in my school to the leadership of the organisation, stating clearly how a recent performance appraisal was too harsh and had potentially affected her mental health. She had just one aim- to speak back- at the powers that be, to simply tell them that they had crossed the line. The email, quite unremarkable in its content but very remarkable in its intent- had another person cc'ed- this teacher's father. I remember reading that email several times, mostly just reading the teacher's father's name and wondering what might have transpired between the two events- the performance appraisal and the email that led to this show of solidarity between the father and daughter. What was the conversation, to which the teacher's father said, "you will write an email to the managers tomorrow and mark me on it". Maybe he added, you are my champ. On receiving that email, there was a perceptible change in the stance of the ‘leadership’. They quickly apologised and as I saw it, retreated.

A few months ago, a similar episode had repeated. I knew someone going through some difficult experience with a service provider and was at the end of her rope. I simply asked her to cc me on her next email. Immediately on being cc'ed, the tone of the email conversations changed and this person received a refund. I didn't say a word. Like the teacher's father, I was just a silent spectator or a witness to emotionally charged email exchanges.  

These experiences have got me thinking about this show of solidarity, between family members at workplaces. Would you mark your family on email, during severely unpleasant email discussions, to tip the power slightly on your side? All the people I have discussed this with have disagreed. The reasons for this are many- it is unprofessional or immature, office proceedings tend to be confidential, and don't fight over email, instead speak in person. I thought through all these reasons and began to wonder if any of these reasons are valid in 2022. I think not. Let me explain. 

Organisations, even some of the smallest ones, have more power over an average employee. This is because of several factors, apart from a feudalistic mindset, which is common in India’s workplaces. In India's neoliberal economy, as elsewhere, industries often have more power than anyone including the state. The decline of labour unions, mandated by the free market, has meant that employees are on their own. Several additional factors aid any organisation in their power play against 'puny' employees- legal backing (the agreements that are signed by employers and employees are tipped against the employee), the Human Resource department, being employees themselves often side with the employers, and very few employees will actually go to court . Most likely, employment agreements bar any kind of recourse to legal aid in most organisations. 

Employees are also genuinely not all that powerful- low levels of education, gender socialisation that teach you that others have more power, the psychological conditioning that entrepreneurs and management are somewhat better, jobs that are anyway very few, financial constraints, caste locations and even regional locations all add to this powerlessness. In a very poorly managed education organisation that I had the misfortune to work in, one of my colleagues who was very unhappy with the leadership told me that the organisation will easily replace her if she were to leave. But she probably wouldn't find a better job, as easily. (Did you instantly assume that my colleague probably was not that great a worker- as you might notice even our imaginations are tightly wired in favour of employers). 

Employers also tend to be male, upper caste and class, and in the non-profit education sector the top leadership is disproportionately male while the lower levels, i.e. teachers and non-teaching staff are female. Hence, as you can see the power really lies with employers rather than employees. So in case there is some sort of a conflict at the workplace, and your manager and you are seated at a table and although it is only you two at the table, your manager has (ahem) company, while you don't. And so, can you bring your pop, mom or sis to this meeting? 

You might say, rather you might have been told, that including your family in a heated or emotionally draining exchange with employers is actually unprofessional. We have been told often what is professional or not by those who simply could. Think of all the things that are considered unprofessional- hair, dress, conduct- decided by those who were traditionally in power. Grooming in professionalism is often done to make others more like themselves (which has its roots in what is known as the white man's burden) or maintain their own positions by telling others that they actually don't belong (on which is hinged the reservation/ merit argument or the imposter syndrome). Do we still need people to tell us what we should or shouldn't do especially when we know that even heads of state and our leaders are truly unprofessional and may I also add, unethical? 

If you have been told that involving your family is immature, (this is not a school-fight where you brought in your parents to intervene!) you are also told that your workplace is like family. You are encouraged to invite your family to official functions and organisations extend benefits to them too (health insurance for example). Organisations encourage employees to bring their whole selves to work, but leave the ‘unpleasant’ emotions at the door. Employees are immature, but managers have been let off the hook of emotional maturity when they have failed to create a safe and dignified workplace. This recent article shows that women gig workers were being driven to their 'workplace' by their husbands. A company doesn't object to this kind of unpaid show of solidarity on behalf of families, as long as it benefits them. (I know this hinges on the yet to be resolved question of unpaid reproductive labour often performed by women, in capitalist economies, while here, we see that this labour is being performed by others too).

The other argument of company proceedings being confidential holds no ground too- as confidentiality allows for a lot of unethical and inequitable practices to thrive, as we saw recently with New York City Council requiring pays scales to be public. We need to also question what constitutes confidentiality. Think of my teacher who went home after the horrendous performance appraisal, telling her parents every single thing. She probably told her parents of all the highs at the workplace too. Workplaces pick and choose the aspects that suit them by terming those that don’t as unprofessional, immature, breach of confidentiality and so forth.

Having said all this, I guess, I make it very clear, dear reader, that we might want to mark our families on that one email when we think we really need support and a little more bargaining power. I also don’t mean to say that we should ‘fight’ over email- meeting in person and discussing is always advisable (but remember that table I was talking about?). I am also aware that not all of us have family members who we can turn to- my mom for example, never ever got involved even in our sibling fights as she firmly believed that we had to learn to resolve conflicts on our own. A lot of us also struggle with a history of abandonment. Besides, not all of our parents have email addresses, or the social capital to feel comfortable in highly intimidating and polished reflective marble and altobond offices. I know the difficulty, and I would say, I hope you never reach a position where you might have to decide who to involve. 

For those on the other side of the table, the recent unacceptable behaviour of Ashneet Grover, the increasing reliance on privatisation and the rise in unicorns that keep circulating power and wealth among those who already have power and access and are bound to misuse it- I have little hope.

Maybe you can help me change my mind?